8 Keys To Saving Your Marriage
Making a decision to fight for your marriage is often a hard one to make, but it is worth it. Divorce affects almost half of all marriages, but the financial and emotional implications are significant. This commonness of divorce has made people devalue the institution of marriage, but it is something that should be fought for, no matter how much effort. Divorce affects men, women, and children, but by following the eight tips below, you can give your marriage the chance that it deserves.
- Sharing values. One thing that can bring a couple together is the same shared values. Church, hopes, and dreams are things that can bond two people together. By taking time to talk about your future hopes and dreams, it can recharge your marriage and help you to realize what brought you together in the first place.
- Positive affirmation. Saying, “I love you” every morning and night, as well as “Good-bye” when you leave from work shows respect and it allows you to leave the house or go to sleep on a positive note.
- Surprise them. A small gift every once in a while of something that they enjoy, such as candy, flowers, or a special meal can really solidify a relationship. Gifts do not have to be expensive, but even small little gifts can be appreciated. A small gift and other actions like this speak louder than words.
- Make togetherness a priority. Whether you go out on a date or spend a quiet night at home, making one on one time together a priority is important. It is easy to be caught up in living life at a fast pace, but slowing down and spending time together can be an investment in the future of your marriage.
- Honesty. Being honest with your significant other is essential. If there is dishonesty in the relationship, this can really destroy the bond. That is why you want to make honesty one of the core values of your marriage. Being honest with each other will allow positive changes to be made and true feelings to be communicated.
- Give it time. You cannot expect your marriage to turn around in an instant, simply because you did not get to this point overnight. Give your relationship some time. Keep from making any spur of the moment decisions. Time will give you some clarity on the situation and help you to see the issues in a new light.
- Show forgiveness. No one is perfect-not even you. Show forgiveness to your spouse and you will, hopefully, receive it as well. Accept each other’s faults and be realistic with your expectations. This can be an important key to a long-lasting marriage that will stand the test of time.
- Do not be too proud to get help. Counseling is not a bad thing. It can be a way to truly see the issues that you have had-just having someone non-judgmental to listen. They can help you to gain communication and listening skills as well. Going to a professional can be the turning point for your marriage, so it is something that you definitely want to consider.
Divorce can be one of the worst things that you can go through, whether you have children or not. The financial responsibilities can drain your bank account and the emotional damage can last far into the future. It often does not end with the final divorce date, too, because it could be necessary to go back to court in the future for custody issues or to learn how to modify spousal support in California. That is why you want to do everything possible to stay married for years to come.
If you feel that your marriage is on the rocks, don’t just give up. Look through the above ways that you can help to strengthen your marriage to find one (or more) that could possibly help you. Whether you simply change the way that you treat each other or you get professional help with your communication or listening skills, you want to give your marriage everything possible to make it stronger. A failing marriage can be saved, if you are willing to put in the effort necessary.
Janis Rodgers is a freelance writer who has been spurred on by recent divorces in her friend’s lives to write articles about strengthening a marriage. When she found at that a friend was looking on www.cadivorce.com for a lawyer, she wrote her first one and has continued since then to help others have a happy marriage, just like hers.